Relational Thinking and the importance of relationships to the economy

Hello Everyone

Steven Covey in his famous book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People says that we need to ‘begin with the end in mind’.  I could not help thinking about this when I heard about a new business/life model developed by Dr Michael Schluter a social thinker, entrepreneur and founder of Britain’s Relationship Foundation.  He spoke about the need for workable relationships in areas as diverse as debt and the economy, criminal justice, care for the elderly, asylum and immigration, the environment, and sexual ethics. 

Dr Schluter says that once our physical needs are met, such as food, shelter and safety the most important things in our lives are our relationships. This includes relationships at work, home, the community – in fact, everywhere!  Even if we have fallen out with family or friends they are still on our mind.  He calls this philosophy relationism or relational thinking.

Is it possible that cultures around the world might shift from being based on individualism and materialism to being based on relationships?   Dr Schulter believes that we are just starting to see some signs that this could happen.   Australia’s Michael Tanner and Britain’s Michael Gove for example, have both spoken about the politics of relationships and the key role Relational Thinking has to play in a post-capitalist political environment.

According to Dr Schulter, the main symptom of relational distress is the breakdown of marriage and what is happening both to children and older people. He says the major drivers behind the breakdown in marriage and the family include: long and unsocial working hours; debt - because debt breaks up families;  the tax system; and corporate structures which mean that the people running companies have little connection with their employees.

Corporations have little idea of what the daily life of their employees involves, and how their decisions affect those employees. Their sole goal is to satisfy the needs of their shareholders.

Dr Schulter goes on to say that there is a need to have a triple bottom line approach to public policy, just as companies are meant to have. We should be evaluating everything the government does from an economic point of view, an environmental point of view and a relational point of view. Governments and corporations tend to only look at the economic impact of policy, and sometimes the environmental impact, but rarely the relational impact of policy. 

 What is your compass for life?  What do you value?  Most people on their death bed are concerned with who and how they have loved rather than how much money they have made or if they should have spent more time at work, or if they should have spent more time at work.

If we begin with the end in mind then the most important thing is our relationships.  How are your relationships?

Live! Love! Laugh!

Roz Townsend  www.roztownsend.com

Declinology ~ are we in decline?

Hello everyone and welcome to my little corner of the world

There has been a lot written about the symptoms of decay and decadence in Western culture.  An Australian documentary  Decadence: Decline of the Western World even goes as far as saying that Western civilisation peaked in 1969 – the year Russians and Americans reached out beyond earth.

Some sobering symptoms are grabbing attention.  Symptoms such as high suicide rates, high consumption of anti-depressants, disintegrating families, uninspiring leadership, obsession with money  and consumption are a few of the obvious ones.

It is little wonder then that yet a new word declinology has been created to brand this school of thought.  Declinology is the advocacy of the belief that one's society is in decline.

The symptom of this new way of thinking that really caught my attention was highlighted by Jacinta Dunn.   She points out that “just before the fall of the Roman Empire, they were all dining on lark’s tongue and nightingale hearts”. 

Not that I have eaten lark or nightingale but I know that much of Western civilisation is obsessed with food.  The incredible number of television programs about food, the books about food and dieting and the pages of major tabloids devoted to food and alcohol consumption are all testimony to this.

Yet I was impressed by a family who live in the bush and are trying to be totally sustainable.   They grow all their own food.  Their vegetable garden, chicken and other livestock take up virtually all of their time.  For this family, at the self sustainability level, the obsession with food production is also obvious.  The difference though is that Western civilisation’s obsession seems to be with consumption and processing of food whereas at the sustainability level it was about the production and nurturing of food sources.

It certainly is an indication of the ‘quality’ of life that some people have that they can devote so much of their time to how and where they will consume their food.

Unfortunately much food is wasted.  In 2011, 1.3 billion tons of food,  about one third of global food production, are lost or wasted annually.  Loss and wastage occur at every stage of food supply chain.   In low-income countries most loss occurs during production, while in developed countries much food – about 100 kilograms (220 lb) per person and year – is wasted at the consumption stage.

We can be aware and responsible for the huge environmental consequences of such waste .  Scarce water resources are wasted and unnecessary greenhouse gas emissions are generated through wasted production and decomposition in landfills.  For example,the methane that decomposing food produces has a greenhouse gas equivalency twenty-five times higher than carbon dioxide.

Where does your time and energy go with food?  Are you favouring  the production or consumption?  Are you part of society on the decline or is your focus on responsible production? 

Live! Love! Laugh!

Roz Townsend  roz@roztownsend.com

Chillax - this is it!

Hello Everyone

A new word is gaining in power in the west and can now be heard in the sub continent. The word is chillax - a combination of ‘chill out’ and ‘relax’.  

It is interesting that English already has many, appropriate words for this state but yet a new word is gaining popularity. 

I believe the word is an indication of part of the wider spiritual paradigm shift taking place in the world.  The shift is drawing our attention on what is happening in the present rather than having our mind dwell on the past or worry about the future.

The increasing pressures of developing worlds, especially the impact of the global financial situation and consumerism are taking their toll.  A common greeting of professional people for example is the question “How are you? Busy?”   The answer usually reflects how extremely busy people are, and to admit to being busy is almost a badge of honour.

It is no wonder that books like Eckhart Tolle’s The Power of Now are such best-sellers.  There is a yearning and healthy need for people to just be in the present moment.  The following is some of the advice to be found in Tolle’s book.

Be present as the watcher of your mind -- of your thoughts and emotions as well as your reactions in various situations. Be at least as interested in your reactions as in the situation or person that causes you to react. Notice also how often your attention is in the past or future. Don't judge or analyze what you observe. Watch the thought, feel the emotion, observe the reaction. Don't make a personal problem out of them. You will then feel something more powerful than any of those things that you observe: the still, observing presence itself behind the content of your mind, the silent watcher.

Many children have the ability to chillax and live in the present.  However, as adults we have certain responsibilities which call us to acknowledge the past and honour the future.

The question is: how much of your thinking time is spent in the past, present or future?  And if you find that your mind is heavily dominated by the past or future then consider it could well be time to chillax.

Live! Love! Laugh!

Roz Townsend  roz@roztownsend.com

The Questionable Value of Narcissism

Hello Everyone
Do you or someone you know have an inflated or grandiose sense of themselves?  Do you, or others you know, think perhaps that you are special, unique, and entitled to better treatment than others?

Then perhaps you are part of the narcissism epidemic.  According to Twenge and Campbell in The Narcissism Epidemic.  The narcissism epidemic is happening at both the individual and cultural levels all around the developed world.

Narcissism is increasing and the book points out that there are many more highly narcissistic people now than just a decade or two ago.  It would appear highly likely that cultures are changing too. Increases in materialism, entitlement, public violence and aggression, self-promotion, and the desire for uniqueness are typical symptoms.

Some specific changes include an increase in: plastic surgery rates; credit card debt; the use of "my" in web addresses; the larger size of personal homes; reality TV shows; narcissistic song lyrics; and the fake paparazzi who can now be hired to experience what it’s like to be famous.

It is interesting to consider that the current economic crisis was, in part, caused by overconfidence and greed which are both key components of narcissism.   The global rebellion of ‘Occupy’ is a reaction to the greed of the wealthy with the emphasis on ‘what about me’.  Narcissism at both ends of the wealth continuum!

The costs of narcissism are high. As societies become more narcissistic there is an accompanying higher level of depression and disconnection.

Many  great philosophers and leaders have highlighted a paradox: we have more meaningful lives when we focus on the needs of others and take the emphasis off ourselves.   It is a concerning trend that whole cultures are becoming more narcissistic .  Narcissism is likely to become an insidious value of society, an addictive trait that might be so powerful that  we become blind to its impact on our true well-being.

Could we ever consider that we are just normal not special?  That we are no better –or worse than others?   Perhaps as the book suggests, we need to consider teaching our children not that "You have to love yourself before you can love others,” but rather you will be the happiest when you love others “If you love yourself too much, you won’t have enough love left for anyone else!”

Live! Love! Laugh!

Roz Townsend   www.roztownsend.com

Beauty and the News

Hello Everyone

Recently I watched a TED show on What is Beauty?  TED is a nonprofit organisation devoted to Ideas Worth Spreading.  It started in 1984 as a conference bringing together people from three worlds: Technology, Entertainment, Design.   Now its medium is the internet where great ideas get incredibly quick global exposure.

In the presentation I am referring to, designer Richard Seymour asked ‘how do we tell that something is beautiful?’  and ‘Why does it matter so much to us?’

To me it matters because mainstream media, in my opinion, shows us little that is beautiful but rather accentuates the ugly.  This is rather worrying because if we agree with the saying ‘what you focus on is what you get’ then this focus disempowers us. 

We have an interesting paradox. Evidently only bad news sells yet I assert that we all have a deep yearning to be nurtured and in touch with the beauty of life.

Scientist and author Steven Pinker of the new book Better Angels of Our Nature: The Decline of Violence in History and its Causes suggests that the human brain is changing.  Evidently the parts of the brain related to stopping violence have become increasingly engaged.

Evidently the evolution of reasoning ability grew as humans started living in cities, reading literature and communicating and travelling long distance.  Higher levels of education also assisted this evolution.

Let me give you an example of how our reasoning ability impacts our ability to value beauty.   Richard Seymour showed a rather ordinary child’s drawing of a flower and a butterfly.  My initial reaction was very bland.  Then he said that this was the last action of Heidi, a five year old before she died of spinal cancer.  And then I thought ‘Oh my, that, is beautiful’. 

Similarly Seymour showed a plastic bag. This to my mind was definitely not beautiful.   Then he explained that the empty plastic bag could be placed in filthy water and by osmosis clean water would be filtered into the bag. Beautiful!!! 

So what is beauty? To me it is a deep reaction from within my inner being, a feeling of love, warmth, gratitude with a desire to stop and dwell on that feeling.

So dear reader, where in your life can you see beauty?  What would it be like for you if you sought out and dwelt on the beauty in the world?

Live! Love! Laugh!

Roz Townsend

Corporate Greed and Integrity

Hello Everyone

These last couple of weeks have seen an interesting revolt around the world.   Ordinary people from all walks of life have joined forces to protest against corporate greed and corruption.

 It seems that there is a universal lack of respect for integrity.  In fact, I wonder if most people even understand the importance of integrity for a world that work with everyone included.

The present global financial crisis is a strong indicator that what is happening in the world right now is not working.  White collar crime, nepotism, excessive corporate salaries, lack of transparency, extortion, bribery, absenteeism, presenteeism, workplace bullying and harassment are all indicators that people are not doing what they promised.   They are not valuing each other nor creating a sustainable future.

 I would like to share with you a definition of integrity that I find very useful, it comes from Landmark Education.

 
Integrity:  Nothing hidden, being truthful and honest, doing complete work, working from an empowering context, and doing very well what you do, doing it as it was meant to be done or better and without cutting corners.

In other words, HONOURING ONE’S WORD: Doing what you know to do, doing what you said you would do and on time, doing what others expect you to do even if you haven’t said that you would do it, and saying when you are not doing this as soon as you realise you won’t be doing it or won’t be doing it on time.

You can see from the above definition that integrity from this viewpoint is not about right or wrong  but what works for us individuals and communities.   You might like to consider that we would have greater workability in the world if we elevated  our integrity.

So dear reader, where in your life could you elevate your integrity?  It would not make you a better person but make your world more workable. What would it be like for you if you valued and endorsed the above definition of integrity?

Live!  Love!!  Laugh!!!

Roz Townsend

Decline in WOmen's Happiness

Hello Everyone

I have come across some interesting research and a new phrase.  The research is from the US General’s Social Survey of 46,000 people and the phrase is the ‘paradox of declining female happiness’.

There is no doubt that progress for women in many (not all) parts of the world has been remarkable.  Education levels have risen and now often surpass those of men, they have gained greater fertility control, and domestic appliances have created a level of freedom from household chores.

Despite these enormous gains in freedom Betsey Stevenson and Justin Wolfers in

‘The Paradox of Declining Female Happiness’ indicate that in the industrialised world women’s happiness has declined both absolutely and relative to men and a new gender gap is developing.

 
The questions being posed : is it possible that the changes brought by the  women’s movement may have in fact unintentionally decreased women’s happiness?
 
Is it that women might be caught up in the cycle of consumerism and comparison?  Might they be feeling that their lives are not measuring up to the ideal? Is it that they might find the complexity and increased pressure of modern lives came at the cost of happiness?

The research indicates that the saddest person in white collar jobs is a 42-year-old unmarried lawyer or doctor.  I find all of this particularly poignant as my own sister, a 45-year-old unmarried lawyer committed suicide a number of years ago. 

Evidently one of the unnecessary pressures that women face is the need to have everything  perfectly balanced.  In contrast, happier women tended to give up on ‘balance” and be OK with ‘messy’.  They go with the flow and are prepared to be more flexible and easy going.

So dear reader, it is not about having it all or doing it all in your life.  What would it be like for you if you  allowed yourself to be more flexible and ‘go with the flow?’

Live! Love! Laugh!

Roz Townsend

Stuff & Spirituality

Hello Everyone

Let’s consider the word ‘away’. Where is away?  This question was posed to me when we throw rubbish away.  ‘Where is away?’  I would like to share with you some comments about where ‘away’ is and how stuff and rubbish might be considered spiritual issues.  

In David Mackay’s book; Sustainable Energy – without the hot air he writes; “One of the main sinks of energy in the ‘developed’ world is the creation of stuff. In its natural life cycle, stuff passes through three stages. First a new born stuff is displayed in shiny packaging on a shelf in a shop. At this stage, stuff is called ‘goods’.

As soon as the stuff is taken home and sheds its packaging, it undergoes a transformation from ‘goods’ to its second form, ‘clutter’.

The clutter lives with its owner for a period of months or years.  During this period, the clutter is largely ignored by its owner, who is off at the shops buying more goods. Eventually by a miracle of modern alchemy, the clutter is transformed into its final form, rubbish. To the untrained eye it can be difficult to distinguish this rubbish from the highly desirable ‘goods’ that it used to be. Nevertheless, at this stage the discerning owner pays the garbage collector to transport the stuff away.

So could it be that ‘stuff’ is a spirituality issue?

Dave Bookless in his book Planetwise commented: “Perhaps the single most effective step I have taken in terms of avoiding waste is to try to pray every time I put something in the bin. As I do so, I give thanks for the natural resources that have created the item and reflect on whether I have been a good steward.

Often my prayers end up as guilty confessions, as I ask myself did I really need this? Did I need the item with all this packaging? Sometimes my anguish is not personal so much as frustration with a culture that dictates I can’t buy things that aren’t covered in polystyrene and plastic, and I simple say sorry for what we as the human race have done in taking this world for granted.“
Perhaps if we see waste as a spiritual issue it might cause us to go back to the start of the process; buying things in the first place. Now, before buying something, consider asking ‘do I really need this?’

So dear reader, do you really need all the ‘stuff’ in your life? And if you throw it away – where is away?

Live! Love! Laugh!

Roz Townsend

The Possibility of Artificial Photosynthesis

Hello Everyone
 
Normally things that are artificial do not attract me. But one is making a big exception!

I am talking about artificial photosynthesis. Scientists are at work on capturing Global Artificial Photosynthesis.  The plan is to capture, convert and store energy from the sun, as plants do.  It is one of the most important technical challenges of the 21^st century.

According to the scientists more solar energy strikes the Earth in one hour than the energy used by all human activity in a year!

Scientists can already use solar energy to split water into oxygen and hydrogen but it is very expensive.

It will be very difficult to mimic the second stage of photosynthesis, where plants draw carbon dioxide from the atmosphere to produce carbohydrates.

Artificial photosynthesis would provide a clean source of hydrogen fuel.  It would also provide basic carbohydrates for food.  By removing carbon dioxide from the atmosphere it would tackle climate change and reduce the use of fossil fuels.

Less water and fertiliser would be needed for growing crops and this would help save the environment.

Just imagine if this artificial photosynthesis took off!

Until next time,

Roz

www.roztownsend.com
Source Health & Science Section The Sydney Morning Herald August 4 2011

Conscious Choices a differences of 280 milliseconds

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Hello Everyone

I often wondered why I can be so well trained in conflict resolution and communication skills and yet get triggered.

The answer seems to be a part of our 'old' brain called the amygdala. The amygdala reacts to negative events with 20 milliseconds whereas it takes our conscious mind 300 milliseconds to react.

The amygdala is desigend to protect us by interpreting subconscious hints of danger with exceptionally fast responses. It bypasses all of our training and mature wisdom and reacts at lightening speed.

So what does this mean? It takes exceptonal skill and will-power to become aware of the response and then to delay or mediate our reaction. Taking a deep breath, a glass of water a walk - do what you can to stall for time so that the more mature you can dominate your primeval instincts.


Cheers
Roz
www.roztownsend.com

PS The amygadala has an incredible memory especially to pain and it never forgets a slight!!

 

Preview

WHat do schools value?

Hello Everyone


Al Gore likes to share this quote and I thought you might like to read it too. It comes from eminent environmentalist Dr. James "Gus" Speth :

I used to think that if we threw enough good science at the environmental problems, we could solve them. I was wrong. The main threats to the environment are not biodiversity loss, pollution, and climate change as I once thought. They are selfishness and greed and pride. And for that we need a spiritual and cultural transformation, something we scientists don't know much about.
I must admit to being a bit disheartened by that even though I felt it was true. I wondered how on earth we can get people to change their values. And then, not long after I came across some interesting information about North Sydney Girls High School. This school no longer awards prizes for first in English or maths. The girls from years 7-10 are rewarded for demonstrating perseverance, resilience, organisation and problem solving skills.
The move away from recognising academic achievement until the senior years is aimed at combating the stress of competition. The award categories are designed to promote a healthy balance in the emotional life of students: resilience, connectedness and innovation. It is no surprise that these categories are also indicators of a long happy life.
An educational transformation is on the way. The values that are required for sustainability , social justice and spiritual fulfilment are being acknowledged in schools. Young people are starting to make informed decisions about how their actions and beliefs can influence the planet.

What do you think about this?

Roz

Are we Owners or Caretakers?

Hello Everyone

Imagine if our local councils granted rights to nature. Imagine them saying ‘no’ that development cannot go ahead because we value the trees, we value the natural beauty of the landscape and scarring the landscape with industrial monoliths disturbs the rights of other living things.

But, in fact a group of people, indeed a whole country can take a stand for sustainability and balance with nature.

Bolivia is set to pass the laws granting nature equal rights to humans. It is called the Law of Mother Earth.

This is one of the most significant laws in the history of human kind and its relationship to the Earth. And yet it has received almost no attention in the media.

According to the journalist John Vidal and the Guardian, the law will establish 11 new rights for nature.

They include: the right to life and to exist; the right to continue vital cycles and processes free from human alteration; the right to pure water and clean air; the right to balance; the right not to be polluted; and the right to not have cellular structure modified or genetically modified.

The controversial part of this is that it will enshrine the right of nature “to not be affected by mega-infrastructure and development projects that affect the balance of ecosystems and the local inhabitant communities”.

This is a major mind shift. The challenge for sustainability on the planet is for us to fully take on that we are no longer the owners and dominators of our environment. The shift will be to see ourselves as caretakers in harmony and balance with living entities around us.

I have often heard the owners of beautiful properties and houses in our community state that the property is not really theirs rather they are looking after it for other generations to enjoy. Imagine if that was the mind shift for all – we are caretakers not owners. This is the underlying philosophy of many indigenous people. Imagine that!!

Roz Townsend- Author Meta Coach Corporate Trainer

Roz Townsend- Author Meta Coach Corporate Trainer:
Hello Everyone


I met a very interesting lady at one of our courses at Rahamim. We were talking about animals and she said that when her dog died she received more than 100 condolence cards.


I must admit that I found it incredible that someone should get 100 card over the death of a dog!


How could a dog’s life create so much I asked? She went on to share some of her stories. The lady was an epileptic and the dog would warn her a minute or two before she was to have a seizure. If she was out and about when the seizure occurred the dog would stand guard over her and not allow anyone near her unless they could assist. No matter where she was she was always safe and her handbag or whatever was not at risk.


The dog also had an uncanny knack of creating peace between other dogs. A an alpha dog , he would often step in the middle of fighting dogs to separate them and send them off to mind their own business. Even as an old dog he continued to do this until he a week or so until he died.


Yes, I think if I had known that dog I would want to have sent a condolence card to his poor owner too.


And recently many Japanese rescuers and the public were brought to tears when a dog had survived three weeks in the water after the tsunami. His rescue brightened everyone and brought emotions of hope and gratitude to so many.

Why am I sharing these stories with you? Because we are increasingly aware that we have a strong connection with all beings on the planet. We also believe that we need to bring forth a human presence that respects all life forms. We celebrate life in all its rich variety.