I have come across some interesting research and a new phrase. The research is from the US General’s Social Survey of 46,000 people and the phrase is the ‘paradox of declining female happiness’.
There is no doubt that progress for women in many (not all) parts of the world has been remarkable. Education levels have risen and now often surpass those of men, they have gained greater fertility control, and domestic appliances have created a level of freedom from household chores.Despite these enormous gains in freedom Betsey Stevenson and Justin Wolfers in
‘The Paradox of Declining Female Happiness’ indicate that in the industrialised world women’s happiness has declined both absolutely and relative to men and a new gender gap is developing.
The questions being posed : is it possible that the changes brought by the women’s movement may have in fact unintentionally decreased women’s happiness?
Is it that women might be caught up in the cycle of consumerism and comparison? Might they be feeling that their lives are not measuring up to the ideal? Is it that they might find the complexity and increased pressure of modern lives came at the cost of happiness?
The research indicates that the saddest person in white collar jobs is a 42-year-old unmarried lawyer or doctor. I find all of this particularly poignant as my own sister, a 45-year-old unmarried lawyer committed suicide a number of years ago.
Evidently one of the unnecessary pressures that women face is the need to have everything perfectly balanced. In contrast, happier women tended to give up on ‘balance” and be OK with ‘messy’. They go with the flow and are prepared to be more flexible and easy going.
So dear reader, it is not about having it all or doing it all in your life. What would it be like for you if you allowed yourself to be more flexible and ‘go with the flow?’
Live! Love! Laugh!
Roz Townsend
Liz, this post is very interesting and matches with research I have seen on older divorced women who are much worse off financially than their male counterparts. It also strikes me that women, as nurturers, are very good at nurturing others but appallingly poor at nurturing themselves. I am not saying that we are selfless, but there does seem to be a crisis of frustration among younger women who find the peer pressure to be "perfect" and in doing so, utterly lose balance in their lives, and older women, who find that they have to struggle at a time when they should be enjoying their lives much more. In both cases, the question of balance is the key factor. Happiness comes with living a balanced, meaningful life. In this hyper connected world we are finding many more disconnected people. Thanks for sharing these ideas:-)
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